A message from her to him

There are many ways to move on in life after breaking up from a serious relationship. One of them happens to be expressing your deepest feelings towards the obstacle to reflect upon them after breaking up. It is a healthy mental exercise provides the user to view their past and present self by noticing the differences. They are able to travel back in time to see their progress and how far they’ve come since then. A woman who recently broke up after a long relationship wrote the following message.

When you are gone

People don’t want you to see what they’re doing if you’re blocked. If someones profile is already on private then why would they go through the extra effort to block you? Manipulators will always trying to cover up their tracks.

Now that you’re gone I can feel the pain boiling up inside. I want to let out by screaming because all I’m able to think is about you hurting me. You left me broken into tiny pieces but after all of this I want you to leave me alone. There is no point in hoping things will change. You’ll never pick up the pieces to even try to put them back together. No turning back from this point. It’s better when you’re gone.

Go for someone who is not only proud to have you, but will also take every risk to just be with you.

Sometimes it’s just best to spend time alone to think about the next step. 🌌🚗

Letting go

Why do I keep allowing myself to come back to the person who hurts me the most? I’m hurting myself by believing things will change. I must accept that the hardest part of this process is letting go. You’ve manipulated and threatened me thinking I’ll fall for your tricks. It’s important that from now on to start focusing on loving myself.

Now that I have been able to cry all the grief from my system and leave it aside I’m able to make new plans and become a better version of myself. I’m not selfish for starting a new journey by myself. You’ll see that now that I’m moving one I will piece myself together without you. If I do not show respect for myself no one ever will. Eventually, I’ll find someone who is right for me and everything will be easy.

I ask myself if it was hard for you to “love” me. I feel that I’m insane for even thinking that you’d care for me the same way I did for you. Even now I’m unsure why I wanted you so bad and why I tried so hard to maintain something with you. To be honest, I never expected much from you at all but a tiny effort would’ve been enough for me. You’re just not capable of even doing the minimal amount of effort and I don’t know why for so long I was incapable of letting go.

The reason why we can’t let go of someone is because we still have hope.

Withdrawal

Every single bone in my body hurts as I await patiently for your call that will never come. I’m tired of call you in that exact moment I feel left alone and I’m tired of you remembering me when no one is around you. I’m just jealous that you put everyone else first instead of me. You say you love me but you constantly blame me for everything you do wrong and can’t even accept your own actions.

Why do I have to take the blame every time? You say you’re tired living in this situation but you tell me that despite everything, if I leave you I will regret my decision. Do you even listen to the words come out of you mouth because that doesn’t show me that you love me at all, if anything, it’s the exact opposite.

After taking the time to step away from everything I’ve come to accept that you only saw me as a hobby. You knew that you were always going to have me and you took me for granted but you gave the minimum so I would not leave you. You made me feel guilty despite all your arrogant attitudes and failures. I never felt unconditional support from you. Even after you leaving you continue to go out and party without asking for forgiveness by just moving on without a care about the damage you caused. After all of that you still come back to manipulate me but I don’t want to fall into your game anymore. I’m done wasting my time with you and I won’t go back to someone who disrespects and humiliates me. You’re an irresponsible self centered child.

The best is still to come. ☀️🌄

Aftermath

Have you ever experienced the pain of disappointment? When you expect a significant other to put their part, but it’s too much for the person who “loves” you to consider doing. He calls me irrational but I’m sure people consider them as basic standards but he see’s them as super high ones. I think maybe the problem is that we were never seeing eye to eye on the same level. The biggest mistake was knowing how you were from the beginning by letting myself get carried away.

Looking back at all the time wasted, all of these years, I could’ve been with someone different with the right kind of love that I deserve. I myself would’ve been a different person as well with someone who would appreciate me. The saddest part of all of this that I still don’t seem to understand is: Why do I still love you despite everything that has caused us to end this way? But for some odd reason I have a feeling that in the end you will suffer the most.

Lessons learned

In this short amount of time of healing I’ve discovered that I should expect from a relationship. 1) Put myself first even if it sounds selfish but no one else will value and prioritize me more than I do. 2) Never stop chasing my dreams or doing things to please others. 3) Believe in actions, never in words. People lie when most convenient but actions will determine their intentions. 4) Not all men are the same. Just because one failed me doesn’t me everyone else will. 5) Stop looking for patterns and similarities in your significant other because you’ll end up in the same mess as last time.

During this time now I’ve also come to love taking care of myself and learn to love myself above anything else because I am an exceptional woman. Just because I wasn’t appreciated by one man doesn’t mean more men will do the same to me because I won’t ever allow it. I never wanted to say goodbye to someone I wished to spend my life with. Now I’m just glad to have learned another life lesson and thank God that it’s over.

– N.S.